I learned something new last Monday from my meetup in NYC. I learned that it is totally okay to be depressed. It doesn't mean you will not try to be happier, but don't beat yourself up in the process. Many people do not like to hear from depressed individuals. But who cares what others think? The important thing is that you love yourself no matter what, whether you are depressed or not. Depression is a reality that many are experiencing. It's part of life.
It is harder to be at peace if you are judging the depression. Do not try to push it away. Instead, get to know your depression. Question the thoughts or beliefs that make you suffer. Is it true? Are you absolutely sure it's true? I learned these questions from The Work of Byron Katie. We have so many negative thoughts that we are not aware of, that make us depressed. Some negative thoughts are: "it's bad that it's raining," "parents should love their children," "war is bad," etc. Questioning these petty thoughts can bring so much relief. Question these thoughts one by one and the mind will gradually or even magically heal itself. Do it for yourself, not for others. Go to thework.com to find out about the 4 basic questions to do inquiry, or email me for the information.
Best of luck!
Friday, April 26, 2013
Sunday, April 21, 2013
The Tough Gets Going
Sometimes you have to act tough if you don't want to go on a downward spiral. Sometimes it helps to fight back. So start now. Make a vow to move forward or upward. Be conscious that your head is filled with depression-thoughts right now. Don't be discouraged by the enormity of the depression. As the saying goes, "a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." You can't get from here to there without that single step, and then another, and then another. If you can train your mind to think negative thoughts, to think that nothing matters, or nobody cares, then you can train your mind to think the opposite as well.
I usually start the day by being conscious of the sun -- so I go to the living room and notice how the sunlight floods the room or how the sunlight is laying on the couch. I pick up my Byron Katie book and lay my head on the couch. Then I notice how the sun hits the page, and how clearly it makes the words appear. If that's all you can do for ten minutes, you've already begun that thousand-mile journey to peace. You have defeated the negative talk in your head for that long. Remember, many times you are not conscious of the thoughts. You believe them automatically, and many times you don't even know that you believe the thought.
It's really so easy to cave in to negative thoughts. Negative thoughts have so much power that it is so easy to depress yourself, consciously or unconsciously, if you wanted to. So be aware of what you are telling yourself or how you view the world. Question your beliefs, such as nobody loves me, it's too difficult, I don't know what to do, etc.. I recommend reading any of Byron Katie's books, especially "Loving What Is," or go to thework.com and familiarize yourself with her method of inquiry to clear the mind, find peace and see reality for what it is.
As you learn to find things that are working for you, the more you will guide yourself into finding the truth that will set your mind free. Your breath is a gift, isn't it? Think about that. Look closely at your hands and feet. Your feet will take you from one place to another. Your hands can make things. You don't have to be a superstar to be happy. You can just sit by yourself or chat with someone over a cup of tea or coffee, and that would be enough. Why are you looking for something or someone if you already have so much in front of you. The more you want money, friends and health, the more you don't pay attention what's just in front of you: the plants, the furniture, the vegetables, tea, the dishes, your Mom, your friend, your neighbor, your dog. Ask yourself why you are asking for more? -- This will help ease your mind and lift your depression, one step at a time.
So go out there, even if you don't want to, you might find something that you will like, by accident. I went to a dance festival last night even if I didn't feel like it, just as a way to fight the oncoming depression. I convinced myself that I will enjoy the evening, the train ride with my sister, the walk to the dance studio, and the dances. I was lucky, because the event was held in a small, intimate setting with big windows that had a spectacular view of Manhattan's evening skyline. The creativity that I witnessed that night inspired the spirit inside me, as I felt the cool breeze coming through. Go out there and find something, experiment. Rate your experience from 1-10. See which ones felt good -- which activity, which place, which person. What thoughts keep popping up?
Fight back!
I usually start the day by being conscious of the sun -- so I go to the living room and notice how the sunlight floods the room or how the sunlight is laying on the couch. I pick up my Byron Katie book and lay my head on the couch. Then I notice how the sun hits the page, and how clearly it makes the words appear. If that's all you can do for ten minutes, you've already begun that thousand-mile journey to peace. You have defeated the negative talk in your head for that long. Remember, many times you are not conscious of the thoughts. You believe them automatically, and many times you don't even know that you believe the thought.
It's really so easy to cave in to negative thoughts. Negative thoughts have so much power that it is so easy to depress yourself, consciously or unconsciously, if you wanted to. So be aware of what you are telling yourself or how you view the world. Question your beliefs, such as nobody loves me, it's too difficult, I don't know what to do, etc.. I recommend reading any of Byron Katie's books, especially "Loving What Is," or go to thework.com and familiarize yourself with her method of inquiry to clear the mind, find peace and see reality for what it is.
As you learn to find things that are working for you, the more you will guide yourself into finding the truth that will set your mind free. Your breath is a gift, isn't it? Think about that. Look closely at your hands and feet. Your feet will take you from one place to another. Your hands can make things. You don't have to be a superstar to be happy. You can just sit by yourself or chat with someone over a cup of tea or coffee, and that would be enough. Why are you looking for something or someone if you already have so much in front of you. The more you want money, friends and health, the more you don't pay attention what's just in front of you: the plants, the furniture, the vegetables, tea, the dishes, your Mom, your friend, your neighbor, your dog. Ask yourself why you are asking for more? -- This will help ease your mind and lift your depression, one step at a time.
So go out there, even if you don't want to, you might find something that you will like, by accident. I went to a dance festival last night even if I didn't feel like it, just as a way to fight the oncoming depression. I convinced myself that I will enjoy the evening, the train ride with my sister, the walk to the dance studio, and the dances. I was lucky, because the event was held in a small, intimate setting with big windows that had a spectacular view of Manhattan's evening skyline. The creativity that I witnessed that night inspired the spirit inside me, as I felt the cool breeze coming through. Go out there and find something, experiment. Rate your experience from 1-10. See which ones felt good -- which activity, which place, which person. What thoughts keep popping up?
Fight back!
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